Aut Caesar Aut Nihil

Uh.

2009-03-17T16:47:04Z

Is it just me or is the Blackberry slogan "connect to everything you love in life with Blackberry" nothing short of terrifying?

Not So Much w/the Whole LJ Thang

2009-03-11T05:52:33Z

But I am blogging pretty steadily over at The Closet Moderate.

Of course, if you don't care about politics, cursing, hilarious youtube clips masquerading as respectable links, and so forth you may want to look elsewhere. Just FYI.

-A

"It HAPPENED!"

2009-01-12T00:39:33Z

Did anyone see that Todd Solondz movie, Storytelling? No? Good. It's a terrible movie.

Anyway, my mother had her kidney transplant this morning, and it seems to have gone well (I'm not given to knocking on wood--knock knock--but this situation seems to merit it.) at least so far.

And I bought an Xbox 360 and have been mired in Left 4 Dead for about, oh, 5 hours so far. Any other game suggestions?

Life is pretty good.

-A

Pay Attention, Bitches.

2008-12-18T22:33:49Z

I am thinking of getting a console for the first time since my PS2 was stolen ON MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY back in 2004. I am now trolling the intarwubs for people's thoughts about which one I should purchase and why.

Wii

Con: Games are crappier, hardware is less muscular.
Pro: I can play Metal Slug and Samurai Shodown and Megaman until MY EYES BLEED.

Xbox 360

Con: Expensive like a Thai Ladyboy in Moscow.
Pros: Better games, Xbox Live.

PS3

Who are we kidding? I'm not buying this piece of shit.

Also, Jake and I were unbanned from MR, which was the missing piece in our total, utter, shattering victory over that organization. In the spirit of that savage routing, I offer you this:

-A

Thought of the Day

2008-12-03T21:01:59Z

Is it just me, or is Alien vs. Predator II way better than AVP?

-A

Less Fantastic News

2008-10-31T14:06:51Z

It was a bum kidney. They implanted the first of two into someone else and it was non-viable, so they opted not to cut my mother open for no reason.

-A

FANTASTIC NEWS.

2008-10-30T15:35:38Z

So, in Philadelphia last night a 47 year old man died of a stroke (probably as a result of the Phillies win--he had a history of high blood pressure) and my mother is getting his kidney!

But get this: they don't have any OR space at UPenn hospital.

I WONDER WHY

-Adrian

Daily Photo

2008-10-28T22:34:17Z

Amazing.

-A

New Blog Posts

2008-09-12T15:49:05Z

Check them out! Sarah Palin, the Terminator, etc.

-A

Shh, Baby, No Words Now:

2008-07-12T16:08:45Z

GORBACHOV: THE MUSIC VIDEO - BIGGER AND RUSSIANER from Tom Stern on Vimeo.

-A

Read! Read! Read!

2008-04-24T19:17:13Z

A few new posts up on the grownup blog. Stop by, it won't bite.

-A

"Look at that horse."

2008-04-23T22:37:11Z

Nothing can prepare you for the absurdity of this video. I think "look at that horse" is going to make its way into my phrasebook.

-A

Your Moment of Zen

2008-04-23T17:32:29Z

-A

"I'll Take Penis Mightier for $600"

2008-04-15T14:54:33Z

Oh, Pen Island, you really should've thought that URL through a bit more.

h/t: Yglesias

-A

P.S. D -- Happy Birthday!

IT'S JUST LIKE IN MY DREAMS!

2008-04-10T14:30:55Z

Since I haven't ever watched the MTV music awards, I somehow missed this awesome performance. Watch it, and know joy.

-A

Bhutan is AWESOME.

2008-04-03T16:39:44Z

Just watch it. It's awesome. It's like an advertisement for how awesome a benevolent dictatorship can be.

1. Bhutanese believe their the Dragon King is literally a God.
2. They use Gross National Happiness instead of GDP.
3. They fed their pigs marijuana for years before figuring out they could smoke it.
4. They did that because the pigs get the munchies and eat more, getting fatter faster.
5. They use hilarious symbols to ward off evil spirits.

-A

26: Officially Old

2008-04-03T12:16:28Z

Jesus, I'm basically 30.

-A

Ninja Burglar Terrorizes Staten Island

2008-01-28T21:46:16Z

Local dojos praise his jewelry-stealing jutsu. My favorite part of the video is the bit where they show the site of the last burglary with the subtitle "Possible Ninja Strike."

Seriously, though, how can you want to see this guy brought to justice? Some of his victims have been severely beaten, it's true, but they were beaten with nunchucks. Additionally, his string of 19 burglaries has rendered some residents of Staten Island unable to let the word "ninja" pass their lips, which I think we can all agree is exactly how it should be.

I fell confident that one day he will overreach himself and attempt to burgle the Samurai Burglar's residence, with awesome results.

-A

Excellence in Blogging

2008-01-25T19:59:53Z

This post gets my vote. You really ought to read it all, even if it is a bit on the long side. It's a better piece of analysis than I've seen out of any commercial news outlet.

-A

Edit: And then Clinton says that "she has to defend herself" from Barack Obama's attacks.

The Money Quote:

I do want to make it clear that our campaigns have to stay focused on what you know the legitimate differences are so we can give voters information.

Yes, and let's all let you forget about that nasty business where your campaign was drawing illegitimate contrasts and peddling false information.

GOOD. GOD.

Also, let's not forget how hilarious Italy is:

Too Soon?

2008-01-22T23:26:24Z

Nothing in his pockets but knives, lint and seven pounds of partially-consumed horse tranquilizers. God, I hope they've finished filming. On the plus side, A Knight's Tale is now classic cinema. I guess.

In lighter news, the new Daft Punk album is totally awesome. If I ever have to drive several miles without stopping, it'll be the soundtrack I use.

-A

Chiggity Check It:

2008-01-17T16:28:09Z

The Library of Congress has uploaded thousands of historical photographs to Flickr.

-A

Happy New Year / Day of the Three Kings!

2008-01-06T23:00:14Z

-A

Internet Stars are Viral

2007-11-02T13:43:45Z

And this video is bizarrely meta-viral. Enjoy.

-A

Human Progress Update

2007-08-25T19:55:34Z

When people gaze at an illusory image of themselves through the goggles and are prodded in just the right way with the stick, they feel as if they have left their bodies. -- The New York Times

Alert the Hague!

2007-04-04T17:10:52Z

And the great demon of the Beyond came down and said unto her, "You, Alanis, shall be my messenger upon the earth and the downfall of mankind shall be heard in every note you sing."

-A